The Neighbor

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Copyright  —  Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

This is my story for Friday Fictioneers this week. It’s a weekly challenge to write a story in 100 words with a beginning, middle, and end. It follows the picture prompt provided for that week. It’s hosted by the talented and gracious Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. This week the photo was also provided by her. Thanks Rochelle.

Link: http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2014/03/19/21-march-2014

The  Neighbor by P.S. Joshi

I live on Floor Five of the old Ramsey Hill Towers. Every day elderly Mrs. Judson from Floor Four gets on to go for her morning walk, as I’m riding to the basement parking garage. We say, “Hello” and a few words about the weather. She then gets off in the lobby.

This morning she seemed pale and a little confused. She didn’t say anything. I thought about it during the day since it was unusual.

When I came home this evening, my husband said, “Guess what! Mrs. Judson’s son found her last night. She was on the floor dead.”

friday-fictioneers

69 thoughts on “The Neighbor”

    • Thanks, Tinkerbell, for reading my story and commenting. I’m glad you liked it. She’ll probably continue to use the elevator as it makes getting to work easier, but it’ll probably never be the same.

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      • Brave of her! Takes a strong heart to go on after seeing a dead person, knowing you might encounter them again! But then if the dead neighbor decides to stick around, I guess your character would get used to it, haha 🙂

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    • Yes, Tinkerbell, I guess you would gradually get used to seeing them. At least in stories it sometimes happens that way. I don’t personally know of anyone who has repeatedly seen a ghost. At least no one’s ever told me about it. : )

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  7. Patricia,
    I can see why she might be confused; dying will do that to a person. 🙂 I’m curious if she’ll come back again. If so, the main character should try to talk to her and see if she knows she’s dead.
    -David

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    • Thanks, David, for reading my story and commenting on it. That sounds like the beginning of a short story. Yes. Dying would be confusing, and you’d look a bit pale also. 🙂 I hadn’t thought about her taking up permanent residence in the building. She probably doesn’t know she’s dead as yet. I suppose people could get accustomed to seeing her like the ghosts in Harry Potter books or those in some of the castles in the UK or old hotels in different parts of the world.

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    • Thanks, Janet, for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you liked it. 🙂 It is true though that we often don’t know our neighbors as well as we might think. Rochelle thought it was sad, and it was in a way. Part of it about some old people living alone and being found dead sometimes happens.

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    • Thanks, Sandra, for reading my story and commenting on it. Yes, I guess it would be horrifying. It’s a good thing she didn’t know it was a ghost at the time. I can imagine how she felt when she found out.

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  18. Guess Mrs Judson was too fond of her morning walk -not that it did her any good-that is why I avoid morning walks,lol!Loved the twist in the tail of this scary tale Patricia-well done 🙂

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    • Thanks, Atreyee, for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you liked it. Well that morning walk didn’t do her much good that last morning, but it might have helped her to become elderly. Habits are apparently hard to break, perhaps even when you’re newly dead. 🙂

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    • Thanks, Jackie, for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you liked it. I like to try a genre that fits the prompt and that seemed to say creepy to me. It seemed to say that to a lot of the writers this week.

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    • Thanks, Weltchy, for reading my story and commenting on it. It is sad that the elderly are sometimes found alone and dead by relatives. What most people liked, however, was that it was a ghost story. I’ve never personally experienced any coming back. I also hope I don’t in future. 🙂

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    • Thanks, Justjoyfulness, for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you liked it. I might move also, if possible. It would depend, I guess, on whether she made more than one appearance. I don’t know if I’d get on the elevator alone again for a while.

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  23. Patricia, Many times those of us who play along with Friday Fictioneers get the beginning or the middle, but often we miss a clear ending. Here, you’ve served up beginning, middle and end with deft skill. Nicely handled.

    Cheers!
    MG

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  24. a solid written story, Patricia. i like your character’s strong sense of intuition….perhaps it will be an asset in the future if she develops this gift.

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    • Thanks Amy for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you liked it. I might ride the elevator again, but I’d make sure someone was on it with me. Since you liked this story, you might like the one I wrote for Adam Ickes blog, Storybook Corner. Thanks. 🙂

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    • Thanks,Russell, for reading my story and commenting on it. Yes, it’s hard on a person. The bad news is, it’s chronic. The good news is, it’s not a pre-existing condition. Although, I doubt even so that any company will insure you. 🙂

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  29. I guess the poor old woman was wondering what was happening, being suddenly dead and all 😦
    On the plus side I expect the narrator will get nice and fit now that she’ll be using the stairs from now on.

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    • Thanks, Alastair, for reading my story and commenting on it. Yes. There were pluses and minuses to that situation. The narrator will have to get up earlier though to make it to the parking garage at the usual time. Thant’s kind of a minus. 😦

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    • Thanks, Sarah Ann, for reading my story and commenting on it. I’m glad you enjoyed it. I think she’ll take a better look at anyone riding an elevator with her. Or, maybe she’ll insist someone ride down with her to the basement.:)

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