Copyright — Bjorn Rudberg
Here we are again with a chance to show our creativity by composing and writing original stories for the Friday Fictioneers weekly challenge. This challenge is to write a story with no more than 100 words. It’s to include a beginning, middle, end, and follow the picture prompt supplied for that week. The gracious and talented hostess for the challenge is author and artist Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. The prompt this week was supplied by Bjorn Rudberg. Thanks Bjorn.
http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2014/08/06/8-august-2014/
Genre: Horror Fiction
Word Count: 100 Words
LOST By P.S. Joshi
I wound through the Sierra Madres, alone and lost. Turning the bend, I spotted a large house with no visible lights on inside. It was perched on the slope.
Desperation clawed at my insides. It was dusk, a bad time to lose my way.
Parked, I grabbed my flashlight, crunched up the gravel walk, and climbed the porch steps. Banging on the door, I waited.
The inside latch unfastened, and the door creaked open a crack. A hand with putrid, rotting flesh slid into view. Trembling all over, I stumbled to the car and somehow drove to a nearby town.
Suspense! I was afraid that hand was going to grab you!
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Thanks Ruth. It almost got me, but not quite. I was faster. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Dear Susan,
Yikes! I’d be stumbling, running and flying to the car.
Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks Rochelle. I’m glad I got the effect I wanted and that you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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I think that you never wanted to look.. probably it was just another lonely soul with a skin condition… but better safe than sound I guess.
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Thanks Bjorn. I’ll send the doctor from the town to check. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Truly scary.
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Thanks Yarmspinnerr. I did my best with 100 words. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Sounds like the Rocky Horror show all over again. Nice one Susan.
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Thanks Sandra. Well, with 100 words, I tried. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Nice environment creation..!! Frightening!!
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Thanks Pratik. I’m glad I got the atmosphere I was trying for, and you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Very good description. Just needed a few more words…who was it, maybe in er hotel, there is a knock at the door…
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Thanks Hamish. If I’d had more than 100 words, I would have added more info. Maybe I can write a longer story one day. I’m glad you liked the description. 🙂 —Susan
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Oh, give the poor soul a chance, that hand is in a desperate need of company! Good story.
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Thanks Lore. I know, right. I’ll see if I can send a doctor from the village. Maybe they can tell me more about that house. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Creepy! Loved the use of action words – you got my skin crawling!
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Thanks Maree. I’m glad I got the effect I wanted, and you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Drive fast. Faster.
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I think that person must have had the heartbreak of psoriasis. And if you know that reference, well, I hope you don’t! Spooky and I’ll meet ya in the nearby town ….
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Oh yikes and yucks! Never Ever knock on a stranger’s door! This was scary, Susan!
Ellespth
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I can imagine your protagonist telling the townsfolk what happened at which point they all go quiet and exchange “looks”. A lucky escape!
There’s nothing like the word “putrid” to put me off my lunch 🙂
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Yikes! Glad he/she got away. Remind me of Stoker’s Dracula. Well done.
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A good one! And thanks for NOT taking the life of the character :-).
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What a clammy story! Great, vivid descriptions, and a very good dodge-the-bullet ending.
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Susan – ring up ghost busters, heard they are back in business! 🙂
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A terrifyingly close call, Susan! Nice job pulling us along too.
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Very suspenseful story, Susan. I was scared by the time the door opened. Good one.
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Oh, what a creepy tale, Susan. This is just the perfect house for a horror story, especially in the middle of the night. I’d be trembling, too.
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Susan, And now we know why no lights could be seen from the road. Chilling. I hope your character took pains not to be followed on the way into town.
All my best,
Marie Gail
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I could beat the fastest jet on my way back with my speed, I am sure 😀 Good description with just 100 words 🙂
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Thanks Shanx. Me too. Thank you for the writing encouragement. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Obviously the protagonist is not a politician otherwise he/she would not have missed an opportunity to shake hands.
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I guess you weren’t too desperate for a helping hand after all. 🙂
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Dear Susan, Don’t read this with the lights off! Scary I say! You certainly made this feel like a horror book and I can just see it unfolding! Excellent set up and creepy good. Love it Susan – you are fantastic! Nan 🙂
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whew. i would’ve done the same thing… run and drive and drive and never look back. great story. 🙂
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All we need here is some equally scary background music. Of course, it could have been a rubber arm from a costume store. My son had one when he was a teenager and enjoyed playing pranks on others with this “third” arm.
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And we’ll never know the of the putrid hand, assuming the hand had an owner to which it was attached. 🙂
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Well thank heaven there was a flashlight so the narrator could see that rotting hand. Who knows what might have happen without it!
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Shades of “Hotel California” … scary … glad the narrator got a look before he went in!
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I was thinking more on the lines of the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0G1Ucw5HDg
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Thanks Georgia for the video of the song. I remembered hearing about it, but I’d forgotten that it was a song and not a movie. I see what you mean by likening it to my story. 🙂 —Susan
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🙂 glad you enjoyed the video … it’s one of my favorite and I’m glad you understood where I was going. Georgia.
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Georgia,Thanks for the video of the song. I think I’d heard of it, but had forgotten it was a song and not a movie. I’m glad that it had the words with it. I can see why you likened it to my story. 🙂 —Susan
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I’m so glad you got away! Scary stuff!
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Thanks LHN. I’m glad I got away too, and I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Loved it! 🙂
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🙂
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Eeew – yuck!
Lol —- what a vivid and disgusting description of flesh —- bleah! But it was a really good piece of flash fiction, none the less. good job playing with 100 words Susan. Certainly atmospheric and creepy. Always makes one want to consider having a really good road map, compass, water, chocolate, candle, emergency flares and blanket when traveling. 😉
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Thanks Pat. I hope you didn’t read the story right before eating. I’m glad I accomplished the right atmosphere. You’re right about the emergency kit. It’s probably a lot safer than stopping to ask directions at a house with no lights on. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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Lol —- no, no worries about food consumption prior or post reading.
Emergency kits – invaluable — but who actually stocks these damn things regularly? I know we have some of the requirements, but still, being a sitting duck in the middle of nowhere is not a great option either.
At any rate, have a great day Susan! 🙂
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Thanks Pat. You have a great day also. 🙂 —Susan
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Awesome and creepy, good work
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Thanks Sean. I’m glad I was able to get the right atmosphere, and that you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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What will she find in the town, though? Love it! 🙂
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Thanks WBHG. What was found in the town would no doubt be a whole other story. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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I’m not sure what I would do in that situation, but running first, asking questions later is probably safest. 🙂
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Thanks David. I agree that it was the right decision to leave with all haste. 🙂 —Susan
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Oooh. that was creepy. It could’ve grabbed her. Luckily she got away. Very good. Well written. Lucy
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Thanks Lucy. You’re right. It was a lucky escape. I’m glad you liked the story, and thanks for the encouragement. 🙂 —Susan
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You left me wanting to know more 😀
I might have run away too! 🙂
All the best —
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Thanks Jen. Maybe I’ll write a longer story one day. I no doubt would have done the same thing as my character. I’m glad you liked the story. 🙂 —Susan
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